Top 10 Alarming Facts About Channel 4 Weatherman Matt Brickman

10- Knows what the actual weather is going to be every single day, but refuses to tell the viewers

9- Has the ability to spray foul odors, not unlike a skunk

8- Won his job after selling his soul to the devil to win a pie eating contest against Al Roker (pre-gastric bypass)

7- Covered in a thin film of maple syrup

6- Has been calling it a “Dobbler” radar for years without anyone noticing

5- Is constructing an ark in his backyard for when the “real thunderstorms” come

4- Almost got fired after “Me Too”ing himself for inappropriate touching without his own consent

3- Thinks it isn’t fair that he has to predict the weather while other anchors don’t have to predict the news

2- Is actually a sentient stormcloud shaped like a human

1- Does not believe in science

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