A Man Eating Chicken
Hi Mom! Or whoever else I actually convinced to look at this website. I was writing these things that I thought were funny. I’d show them to my wife, who would agree, and submit them to various writing outlets, who would instantly reject all of them. Now I can appeal to you, the court of public opinion, who would never, ever, ever judge me unfairly. Enjoy!(?)
Here are the things you can read
Top 10 Night Moves Bob Seger Was Singing About in the Song “Night Moves”
10- Going back to yesterday by crossing time zones right after midnight 9- Juggling in the dark 8- Falling asleep like right after climbing into bed, literally under five minutes 7- Drinking alone 6- Turning into a bat 5- Getting a head start on tomorrow’s chores 4- Picking up chicks, then putting them back down…
Worst of Craigslist Missed Connections
You would have gotten me to work on time m4t I slept in and got to Grand Central at 9:37. You left at 9:30. You were a little old, honestly a little dirty, but I needed you in my life. If you are reading this, reply with your final stop so I know it’s you.…
Top 10 Things to Do if You Find a Rat in Your Toilet
10- Befriend the toilet rat, only to ultimately betray it 9- Put a cat in the toilet 8- Burn the house down 7- It’s the rat’s house now. Move into the sewer that the rat vacated 6- If there’s a rat in the toilet, then what’s in the rat trap? Sorry, another rat! 5- Ask…
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